This week on Reframing Me, we’re talking about identity, but not in a “find yourself” or completely reinvent your life kind of way. We’re starting with the way identity is actually built: through our roles, relationships, experiences, the feedback we receive from other people, and the parts of ourselves that get reinforced over time.
After a night seeing Olivia Rodrigo with my daughter, I found myself thinking about how comfortable she seems holding so many different parts of herself at once. That connected with something else I’ve been thinking about lately through relational dialectics, especially the tension between integration and separation. As everyone in my family grows more into their own individual lives, I’ve been noticing how much of my energy still goes toward keeping us connected as a whole, and how little space I sometimes leave for my own separation, wants, and preferences.
So in this episode, we’re walking through some of the identity work together. Who are you? Where did those identities come from? Which parts of you have become especially central? What qualities exist underneath your roles? What still feels true, and what might you simply be very good at being because you’ve been doing it for years?
We’ll also talk about the question I keep coming back to: Who would I be if I were truly free? Not free from responsibility, relationships, or real life, but free from expectation long enough to notice what actually feels like you.
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