{"version":"1.0","type":"rich","provider_name":"Acast","provider_url":"https://acast.com","height":250,"width":700,"html":"<iframe src=\"https://embed.acast.com/$/69c14b10fce4b829c518519a/69efef453f40b76716f11e8b?\" frameBorder=\"0\" width=\"700\" height=\"250\"></iframe>","title":"Why you can't stop people-pleasing (and it's not because you're too nice)","thumbnail_width":200,"thumbnail_height":200,"thumbnail_url":"https://open-images.acast.com/shows/69c14b10fce4b829c518519a/1777644015410-4ea40ff3-7b4c-4368-8d95-bfd048b3e245.jpeg?height=200","description":"<p>554. This week, Dr. Ho reveals that people-pleasing isn't a personality trait—it’s a survival strategy. If you constantly say \"yes\" while feeling a quiet sense of self-betrayal, you’re likely stuck in the fawn response, a nervous system reflex designed to keep you safe by keeping others happy.</p><p><strong>Dr. Judy breaks down:</strong></p><ul><li><strong>Kindness vs. Compulsion:</strong> Why true generosity feels good, but people-pleasing feels like fear.</li><li><strong>The \"Social Pain\" Connection:</strong> How your brain processes rejection exactly like physical injury.</li><li><strong>The High Cost of Silence:</strong> Why \"keeping the peace\" actually destroys intimacy and fuels resentment.</li></ul><p><strong>Take Action:</strong> Learn three practical tools to break the cycle, including the <strong>\"Pause Practice\"</strong> to stop the automatic yes and how to name the specific fears driving your behavior.</p><p>Stop performing and start being known.</p><p><br></p><p>Have a mental health question? Email Dr. Judy's team at at&nbsp;<a href=\"mailto:psychologist@quickanddirtytips.com\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">psychologist@quickanddirtytips.com</a></p><p>Find Savvy Psychologist on&nbsp;<a href=\"https://www.facebook.com/savvypsychologist\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Facebook</a> and subscribe to the&nbsp;<a href=\"https://www.quickanddirtytips.com/savvy-psychologist-newsletter/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">newsletter</a>&nbsp;for more psychology tips.</p><p><br></p><p>Watch on YouTube: <a href=\"http://www.youtube.com/@SavvyPsychologist\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">www.youtube.com/@SavvyPsychologist</a></p><p><br></p><p>More from Dr. Ho on her other channels:</p><p>Dr. Ho's <a href=\"https://drjudyho.com/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">website</a>, <a href=\"https://drjudyho.substack.com/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Substack</a>, <a href=\"https://www.linkedin.com/in/drjudyho/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">LinkedIn</a>.</p><p>Savvy Psychologist is a part of Quick and Dirty Tips. Find a transcript at&nbsp;<a href=\"https://www.quickanddirtytips.com/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">QuickandDirtyTips.com</a>.</p>","author_name":"QuickAndDirtyTips.com"}