Episode 8
Navigating Masculinity Part 2
Raising Awareness on Coercive Control and Challenging Misogyny
Guest: Andrew ‘Bernie’ Bernard — speaker, author and educator
Trigger Warning
This episode contains a continuation of Bernie’s story about his testicular cancer and the harrowing account of his sister Sarah’s murder by her abusive partner in 2012. If either of these subject matters are sensitive to you, please think carefully before listening.
If This Episode Has Raised Issues for You
If you or someone you know has been affected by domestic abuse or coercive control, the following organisations can help:
National Domestic Abuse Helpline (Refuge): 0808 2000 247 — free, 24 hours a day
Men’s Advice Line: 0808 801 0327
Coercive control information: refuge.org.uk
Episode Description
In the second part of the conversation with Andrew ‘Bernie’ Bernard, the tone shifts. Bernie picks up from where Episode 7 left off — with his work in schools on testicular cancer, his session Life by the Balls, and the students who have kept him humble over the years.
Then he tells the story of his sister Sarah. In 2012, Sarah was fatally stabbed by her partner Ian Hope, who was convicted of murder and given life with a minimum tariff of 17 years. Bernie talks about what led up to that night, the failures in the police response, the changes that followed, and what he has done since to educate young people about coercive control and domestic abuse through his keynote Sarah’s Legacy.
The conversation then moves to the Manosphere — the manufactured male victim narrative, the misuse of statistics, the pipeline from online influencers to real-world attitudes, and what Bernie believes can be done about it. He talks about feminism, about the word itself, about the 31% of Gen Z men who now believe women should obey their partner, and about why education, media literacy and empathy remain the only long-term answers.
This is a serious, important and at times difficult episode. It is one of the most substantive conversations about male responsibility and violence against women that you will find on any podcast.
You can find Bernie as \"What Makes A Man\" on Instagram
Timestamps
00:27 Domestic Violence and the World Cup Statistic
01:08 Trigger Warning
02:12 Continuation — Testicular Cancer and Life by the Balls
02:51 Your Hands Are Down There Anyway — The Talk
03:18 The Best Questions Bernie Has Been Asked
05:55 The Other Reason Bernie Speaks in Schools — Sarah’s Legacy
06:05 Sarah’s Story — How She Met Ian Hope
07:07 The Escalation of Abuse and the Night of the Murder
09:09 What Bernie Felt — Disgust, Not Anger
10:04 The Saviour Complex and Bread Crumbing
11:08 What Happened on the Night — The Police, the Address, the Failures
15:20 What Changed as a Result of Sarah’s Case
17:19 The Government Strategy for Violence Against Women and Girls
17:53 Manufactured Male Victim — How the Story Gets Flipped
19:28 The Impact of Bernie’s Work in Schools
19:56 The Manosphere and the Amplification of Misinformation
21:05 The Statistics on Domestic Abuse Charge Rates
22:25 Boys in Schools Saying It’s Unfair — and What Bernie Sends Them
23:30 The Manosphere Pipeline — From Influencers to Mainstream
24:10 The Louis Theroux Documentary — What It Got Right and What It Missed
24:40 The Word Feminism — Dom and Bernie’s Discussion
25:46 31% of Gen Z Men Think Women Should Obey Their Partner
26:50 The Manosphere Pipeline and the Gileadisation of America
28:08 Rwanda Has the Highest Proportion of Women in Parliament
29:10 What Needs to Change — Education, Media Literacy, Critical Thinking
29:43 Empathy Light Bulbs — Nudged Between Empathy and Judgement
31:00 What’s Being Sold to Boys Now Is What Was Sold to Women for Decades
33:20 Thanks Bernie — Where to Find Him
34:05 Dom’s Closing Reflection
PREVIOUS EPISODES -
From Patrol To Podium - Torque | Acast
Debunking Sleep Myths - Torque | Acast
Lessons From A Father's Influence - Torque | Acast
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