For many parents, the biggest worry when a relationship ends is not the house or the finances, but the children. In this episode of What Next?, Nick Coffer, Claire Webb and Carlie Norris explore what children experience when parents separate, and what tends to help most at a time of change.
Drawing on their experience as family mediators, they discuss the common fear that separation itself will harm children, and why ongoing conflict is often the greater challenge. The conversation looks at how children feel and interpret what is happening around them, the pressure parents place on themselves to get everything right, and the importance of listening, communication and reassurance.
They also reflect on the language we use around separation, the value of predictability and routine, and why arrangements for children work best when they are flexible and agreed together. Mediation is discussed as one way families can create space to think, reduce conflict and focus on what children need as their lives continue to change.
A thoughtful, reassuring episode for parents navigating separation, and for the professionals who support families through it.
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Nick Coffer is a family mediator and former BBC Broadcaster. He runs Way Forward Mediation in Hertfordshire.
Carlie Norris is the founder of Circle Mediation and a family mediator. Her background includes work in children’s services.
Claire Webb is a family mediator, solicitor and arbitrator, and is a founder of Family Solutions Now in Portsmouth.
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Disclaimer: The content of this podcast is intended to offer general information and reflection, based on professional experience. It is not a substitute for advice about individual circumstances, nor should it be taken as personal advice, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional guidance where needed.
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