You know what you do. You know why you do it. You can name the pattern, explain the behavior, trace it all the way back to where it started.
And you're still stuck.
That's not a failure. That's not a sign you haven't done enough work. That's the difference between understanding your emotions and actually processing them. And most of us were never taught that those are two completely different things.
In this episode, Alyssa introduces the somatics of emotions — where feelings actually live when you push them down, what happens in your body when your head is convinced it's handled, and why knowing more will never be the thing that finally gets you unstuck.
She opens with the beach ball analogy. You know the one — both hands pushing it underwater, holding it down, until your grip slips and it bonks you right in the face. That's what happens when we suppress instead of process. And that's exactly why so many women decide it's safer to feel nothing at all.
Alyssa also shares her own experience of spending years as a therapist understanding trauma, naming patterns, helping clients move through their pain — while quietly intellectualizing her own. Knowing everything. Feeling safe in the knowing. And not realizing that understanding had become the workaround.
In this episode:
The takeaway: Next time you start to feel overwhelmed, try the sky and weather visualization. You are the sky. Whatever is happening — the anxiety, the grief, the tension in your chest — that's the weather. It's passing through you. It's not you. Can you separate yourself from it just a little? Can you notice it without becoming it? That small shift — that's where processing actually begins.
Chapters
00:01 Why understanding your emotions isn't enough
00:50 The beach ball analogy — what happens when you push feelings down
02:58 Where do your feelings actually go when you suppress them?
04:32 Alyssa's story: years of understanding trauma without realizing she wasn't feeling it
09:04 How knowing became the safe workaround — and why it keeps you stuck
15:30 Understanding lives in your head. Healing lives in your body.
18:00 The \"hurry up and heal\" feeling — and why it makes complete sense
20:44 The difference between marinating in a feeling and sitting with it
22:17 You are the sky. Your emotions are the weather.
25:31 What it actually means to process an emotion instead of suppress it
26:39 What Alyssa's telehealth therapy session looked like last week
28:29 The tension in your chest, the lump in your throat — you can't think your way out of those
30:12 The takeaway: knowing isn't the same as processing
31:25 The sky and weather visualization in practice
36:08 Who Her Steady Circle is for and what happens inside
Join Her Steady Circle Membership — first week free
Apply for Reclaim
Catch Alyssa on IG @heyalyssabooth
","author_name":"Alyssa Booth"}