Dear Universe… How the Fuck Did I Get Here?
I grew up genuinely believing life was going to be rainbows and unicorns.
I was surrounded by love, an incredibly close family and amazing friendships. Then I grew up and discovered something nobody really prepares you for:
Adulthood can be beautiful and brutal at exactly the same time.
In this episode, I’m going back to the beginning — friendships, motherhood, marriage, divorce, starting again, losing myself and eventually figuring out who the hell I actually am.
After recently losing an old friend to suicide, the conversation also goes somewhere I hadn’t planned. I talk about the things people carry that nobody else can see, complicated grief, empathy, unhealthy relationships and one of the hardest lessons I’ve had to learn:
I can feel sorry for what happened to you without allowing what happened to you to keep happening to me.
Maybe I don’t actually want the old me back.
Maybe I want to take the optimistic girl who believed in unicorns and rainbows forward with me — just with better boundaries, more confidence and considerably less tolerance for bullshit. ❤️
⸻
A note about this episode
This episode contains discussion of suicide, suicide bereavement and unhealthy/abusive relationships.
If you’re struggling, please reach out for support.
Samaritans: 116 123 — free, 24/7
NHS 111: For urgent mental-health support in England. Call 999 in an emergency.
National Domestic Abuse Helpline (Refuge): 0808 2000 247 — free, confidential and available 24/7.
You don’t need to know exactly what to say.
“I’m not okay, and I think I need some help.”
That’s enough to start. ❤️
","author_name":"Amy"}