Have you ever had something happen in your love life that affected you far more than you thought it should?
Maybe someone pulled away. You got rejected. Or a relationship ended. And instead of simply feeling disappointed or hurt, you couldn’t stop thinking about it. You replayed what happened, obsessed over what you could have done differently, and felt desperate to get back the person or connection you lost.
At what point does normal disappointment become something deeper?
In this episode, I sit down with Gabby Bernstein to talk about what’s really happening when someone pulling away, rejecting us, or becoming unavailable triggers a reaction that feels completely out of proportion to the relationship itself.
We talk about anxious attachment, obsessive thoughts and rumination, the difference between wanting love and needing a relationship to feel safe, and why certain people can become so difficult to let go of. We also explore how these patterns can influence who we’re attracted to in the first place.
Gabby shares a practical four-step exercise you can use when you feel emotionally hijacked, so that instead of immediately reaching for the other person, you can begin to understand what the reaction is actually asking for.
Because sometimes the person you’re desperately trying to get back isn’t the thing you need most in that moment.
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