Dating is vulnerable enough on its own. But what does dating look like when you're also carrying a hereditary cancer risk, a history of preventive surgeries, scars, ongoing medical surveillance, and a story you're still learning how to navigate yourself?
In this episode of BRCA & Beyond, Marisa sits down with Tracy Milgram, founder of BRCAStrong, for a candid conversation about dating as a previvor, and the parts of dating after hereditary cancer risk that aren't talked about nearly enough.
Tracy opens up about dating after a prophylactic double mastectomy and other risk-reducing surgeries, including the questions that can come with letting someone new into your life: When do you tell them you're BRCA positive? When do you talk about your mastectomy? How do you prepare for someone seeing your scars for the first time? And how do you know when someone has earned access to such a personal part of your story?
Together, Marisa and Tracy talk about body image and learning to accept a body that has changed, rebuilding confidence, navigating the fear of rejection, and the difference between hiding your story and protecting it until you feel safe enough to share it. They also explore how someone's reaction to disclosure can reveal a lot about whether they're the kind of person you want beside you.
The conversation goes beyond physical changes, too. Hereditary cancer risk doesn't end when surgery does. There are still screenings, doctor's appointments, scan anxiety, family implications, and moments when the weight of it all comes back. What does it mean for a new partner to step into that reality, and what kind of compassion, honesty, vulnerability, and support should you expect in return?
Tracy also shares the unique experience of dating while being a public advocate, when a quick Google search can reveal parts of your medical history before you've decided you're ready to share them yourself.
Ultimately, this episode isn't about finding the \"right\" way to date as a previvor. It's about deciding what feels right for you...when to share, how much to share, who feels safe enough to share it with, and remembering that someone else's reaction to your story does not determine your worth.
About Tracy Milgram:
Tracy learned she carried a BRCA2 mutation at 21 after undergoing two benign lumpectomies as a teenager. After navigating hereditary cancer risk for more than a decade, she underwent risk-reducing gynecologic surgery followed by a prophylactic double mastectomy.
In 2015, Tracy founded BRCA Strong to create an inclusive community where previvors, survivors, and others affected by hereditary cancer can connect, share their experiences, and find support through the physical and emotional realities of this journey.
Education That Empowers 2026
Join Tracy, BRCA Strong, and the hereditary cancer community for Education That Empowers on September 26, 2026, from 8:30 AM–3:00 PM in Fort Lauderdale, Florida—a day dedicated to education, connection, advocacy, and support.
Tickets: https://go.brcastrong.org/2026/education-that-empowers
Connect with BRCA Strong
Website: www.brcastrong.org
Instagram: @BRCAStrong
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