The days leading up to my preventative double mastectomy felt like living in slow motion. Every bedtime routine, every hug with my boys, every glance in the mirror carried a weight I can’t fully describe. I prayed. I cried. I tried to hold onto ordinary moments, knowing life would never feel the same.
In this raw episode, I take you into those final days before surgery, the surreal walk into the operating room, and what it was like to wake up in a body that no longer felt like mine. I share the pain of drains and expanders, the grief that crashed over me in the shower, and the strange coexistence of fear and peace.
I also talk about my choice to undergo a nipple-sparing mastectomy — and why, for me, holding onto anything I could mattered. The lift and reduction I had beforehand, the identity I lost, and the faith that gave me clarity when I needed it most.
This isn’t just a story about surgery. It’s about grief, motherhood, faith, and finding resolve when everything feels broken. If you’re facing your own surgery or supporting someone who is, I want you to know: you’re not alone in the fear, the grief, or the healing.
","author_name":"Marisa Stachelski, Cancer Survivor & BRCA2 Previvor"}