Anxiety author Caroline Foran joins Laura for a deeply personal conversation about parenting a young son recently diagnosed as autistic with a PDA profile, alongside her own long history with anxiety.
Caroline talks openly about the years before the diagnosis, the blame she turned inward, and everything she has had to unlearn about parenting. She explains what PDA β Pervasive Drive for Autonomy β actually looks like day to day, why traditional approaches can make things worse, and the social pressure of being seen to \"manage\" a child whose nervous system is set on high alert.
She also shares her own anxiety story, from a frightening breakdown at sixteen in Italy through to the severe physical anxiety that took over her twenties. Caroline talks about medication, CBT, and the years of work behind her new book Everything I Wish I'd Known About Anxiety, and why so much of recovery came from showing her body safety rather than trying to outthink her own mind.
Discovering a PDA profile β Caroline explains Pervasive Drive for Autonomy and what it means for her son's nervous system day to day.
Why traditional parenting backfires β Holding firm boundaries can push a PDA child straight into fight or flight, even at five.
Lowering the demands β A low-demand, declarative-language approach has reshaped everyday life at home.
Performative parenting β The urge to respond to her son for the benefit of onlookers, even with close friends.
The years before the diagnosis β A bumpy COVID start, severe separation anxiety and two preschool attempts that left him distressed.
Caroline's anxiety story β A breakdown at sixteen in Italy and a severe physical episode at twenty-five.
Medication, CBT and self-compassion β Prozac, behavioural therapy and learning to respond to anxiety with kindness rather than self-attack.
Showing the body safety β Why walking, rhythm and bottom-up regulation worked better than trying to master her thoughts.
The cost of constant stimulation β Social media, the pleasureβpain balance and collective anxiety since COVID.
Everything I Wish I'd Known About Anxiety
Dr Anna Lembke β Dopamine Nation
02:00 β \"Is he non-verbal?\" introducing her son
02:30 β Autism with a PDA profile
03:00 β What PDA stands for
04:30 β Nervous system disability and perceived demand
06:00 β Why traditional parenting can backfire
08:00 β Performative parenting in public
10:00 β A pillow on the grass and what dysregulation looks like
13:00 β Blaming herself before the diagnosis
17:00 β Sensory overwhelm and rethinking exposure
20:00 β Preschool, school and what comes next
30:00 β Family life, marriage and never a date night
33:30 β Caroline's anxiety story begins in Italy
39:00 β A severe breakdown at twenty-five
45:00 β Starting medication and what Prozac actually did
51:00 β CBT, behavioural experiments and getting her life back
56:00 β Showing the body safety
59:00 β Social media and the pleasureβpain balance
01:04:00 β Caroline's new book
01:05:30 β Advice and the meaning of life
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