In this episode of Unspoken Rules, we dive into one of the most overused—and misunderstood—words in everyday life: sorry. Sparked by a listener’s voicemail, the team unpacks the many meanings behind this seemingly simple word, from polite reflex to genuine expression of remorse.
Host Lizzy reflects on her own habit of over-apologising—something many of us can relate to—whether it’s saying sorry for sneezing, asking someone to move their bag, or even when someone else bumps into you. But why do we do this? Is it cultural, gendered, or simply ingrained social behaviour?
To explore this, the episode features insights from Dr. Eva Ogiermann, a linguistics expert specialising in apologies across cultures. She explains how apologies have evolved from serious, religious acts of seeking forgiveness into everyday social tools—especially in English, where “sorry” can be used casually and often without deep intent.
Mediator, Stephen Wildblood KC, adds another layer, sharing how apologies function in conflict resolution. He highlights the importance of sincerity, tone, and body language, noting that words alone don’t determine whether an apology feels genuine.
The episode also examines cultural differences. Research shows that British people apologise far more frequently than others—often automatically—while in countries like Germany, apologies are less frequent but more deliberate and meaningful.
Through listener stories, including a failed grand romantic gesture involving graffiti, the episode reveals how complicated apologies can be. Ultimately, it asks: has “sorry” lost its meaning, or has it simply evolved?
Producers: Jake Preston, Lizzy Leach, Michael Ellis
Editors: Michael Ellis, Jake Preston
Sound Designer: Michael Ellis
With special thanks to Stephen Wildblood and Dr. Eva Ogiermann.