In this conversation, Dr Elizabeth Jeglic, Professor of Psychology at John Jay College of Criminal Justice in New York and a researcher specialising in sexual violence prevention, child sexual abuse and sexual grooming, shares what more than two decades of research has taught us about how grooming happens.
Dr Jeglic explains the different stages of the grooming process, from identifying vulnerability and gaining access to a child, through building trust, gradually crossing boundaries and the behaviours that can continue after abuse to discourage a child from telling. Importantly, she explains why grooming can be so difficult to recognise. Many individual behaviours can look like completely normal, positive interactions between an adult and a child. The difference can become clearer when we understand patterns, boundaries and the behaviours research has identified as potential warning signs. Her research with survivors found grooming behaviours reported in more than 99% of the cases studied, with multiple behaviours typically occurring as part of the process.
The conversation also explores why parents themselves can be groomed, why familiarity and trust can make concerning behaviour harder to recognise, and why we need to move beyond outdated ideas about who may harm a child. We also discuss how parents can talk to children about grooming without frightening them, the importance of using correct anatomical language, helping children identify more than one trusted adult, child-on-child sexual harm, online abuse, and what to say to a child who realises that something they experienced wasn't OK.
Above all, Dr Jeglic's message is clear. Children are never responsible for being groomed or sexually abused. Grooming involves psychological manipulation, and understanding how that process works can give adults and children more knowledge to recognise concerning behaviour and seek help. Dr Jeglic would like education about sexual grooming and its warning signs to become part of standard education for children, parents, professionals and organisations, alongside clearer policies designed to protect children.
To contact Dr. Jeglic: www.linkedin.com/in/elizabethjeglic
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This podcast provides a platform for contributors to share their own lived experiences. Unless expressly stated otherwise, Something to Say has not independently verified the factual accuracy of statements made by contributors and does not endorse or adopt any allegations, assertions, opinions or conclusions expressed in this recording.
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