{"version":"1.0","type":"rich","provider_name":"Acast","provider_url":"https://acast.com","height":250,"width":700,"html":"<iframe src=\"https://embed.acast.com/$/6338983c88c51f0012371fdc/66049dea591038001684b1cc?\" frameBorder=\"0\" width=\"700\" height=\"250\"></iframe>","title":"I Want to Eat Metal","description":"<p>With Niki trapped in the labyrinthine tunnels beneath the Boston Convention and Exhibition Center, emergency reserve friend merritt k joins LB and John to discuss websites about eating metal, Bigfoot's dick, an interesting car LB spotted and its resulting bevy of secrets, who we would impersonate if we were to impersonate a celebrity, the secret to a successful marriage, sexy entertainment value, and somehow, even more.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Welcome to If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes, a podcast about navigating the cruelty, chaos, and wonder of our terrifying world. Niki, John, LB— and our producer Jordo— try to find meaning and clarity one or twelve subjects at a time: from the menu at Cheesecake Factory to a human man dressed up as Snoopy tucking you into bed.</strong></p><p><br></p><p><strong>Who are we?:</strong> We are&nbsp;<strong>Niki Grayson (</strong><a href=\"https://twitter.com/godsewa\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>https://twitter.com/godsewa</strong></a><strong>)</strong> (the Buster Keaton of basketball),&nbsp;<strong>John Warren (</strong><a href=\"https://twitter.com/FloppyAdult\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>https://twitter.com/FloppyAdult</strong></a><strong>)</strong> (business boy and wassail pervert, short),&nbsp;<strong>LB Hunktears (</strong><a href=\"https://twitter.com/hunktears\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>https://twitter.com/hunktears</strong></a><strong>)</strong> (handsome genius, 5'8\", America's Gamer), and producer&nbsp;<strong>Jordan Mallory (</strong><a href=\"https://twitter.com/Jordan_Mallory/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>https://twitter.com/Jordan_Mallory/</strong></a><strong>)</strong> (frog with computer). Music by Jordan Mallory and Art by Max Schwartz (<a href=\"https://maxds.itch.io/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">https://maxds.itch.io/</a>).</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Follow the show:</strong> <a href=\"https://www.twitter.com/ifyouredriving\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">https://www.twitter.com/ifyouredriving</a> <strong>Support us:</strong> <a href=\"https://www.patreon.com/ifyouredriving\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">https://www.patreon.com/ifyouredriving</a></p>","author_name":"If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes"}