Why can everyday noise feel impossible to ignore when you have AuDHD? In this episode of AuDHD for Grownups, your neurodivergent besties Callie and Jayne talk about noise sensitivity, unexpected change, justice sensitivity, and what happens when something affecting your nervous system sits firmly outside your control.
This podcast was created on the lands of the Ngunnawal, Wadawurrung, and Dja Dja Wurrung Peoples.
Hello, hello, and welcome to F Them Fish: AuDHD for Grownups with your neurodivergent besties, Callie Elward-Barrett and Jayne Gurton. Where we talk about neurodivergence in real adult life: work, relationships, burnout, overwhelm, identity, and all the weird little things that make you think, ‘surely it’s not just me’. We’re honest, occasionally sweary, and very much not interested in pretending to be polished.
Grab a beverage, or body double some life admin with us in your ears, and let’s get started.
Jayne has new neighbours. They seem lovely, but they have also brought children, dogs, visitors, music, and considerably more noise into what was previously a very quiet neighbourhood. In this episode, Jayne asks Callie for some coaching advice about what to do when the sound around your home suddenly changes and your nervous system is having very big feelings about it. They talk about AuDHD noise sensitivity, sensory overload, and why home is an important place for recovery and regulation.
Callie introduces the circles of control, influence, and concern as a way of thinking through situations that cannot immediately be changed. They discuss whether reframing your thoughts is genuinely helpful, or whether it can feel suspiciously like gaslighting yourself into pretending something is fine.
Naturally, the conversation then wanders into fairness, ethical consumer choices, and the personal hills neurodivergent people are prepared to die on. This leads to a few unexpected realisations about justice sensitivity and why some things can feel not just annoying, but fundamentally wrong.
In this episode:
· AuDHD and noise sensitivity
· Why some sounds are so difficult to ignore
· Sensory overload at home
· Why home is an important neurodivergent safe space
· Coping when you cannot remove yourself from the noise
· Balancing your sensory needs with other people’s needs
· The circles of control, influence, and concern
· Reframing negative thoughts without dismissing your feelings
· The difference between reframing and toxic positivity
· Feeling hyper-aware of your impact on other people
· Fairness, reciprocity, and resentment
· Neurodivergent justice sensitivity
· Ethical consumer choices and the hills we choose to die on
· How relationships and familiarity can help build empathy
Timestamps
00:00 Catching up with our besties
01:54 Jayne's new neighbours
06:51 Noise, boundaries, and competing needs
08:47 Sensory sensitivity and accepting what you cannot change
11:40 Circles of control, influence, and concern
13:22 Reframing
16:42 Fairness, reciprocity, and being hyper-aware
21:19 Ethical choices, personal values, and the things that stick
24:25 Consumer power and voting with your money
25:46 Justice sensitivity and the hills we will die on
29:51 Queer Quail, Pride Month, and the NeuroQueer Engineers
This conversation is based on Callie and Jayne’s lived and professional experience with AHD and Autism. It is not medical or psychological advice, and neurodivergent people may experience noise, sensory processing, emotional regulation, and justice sensitivity differently.
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AuDHD for grownups: honest, funny conversations about work, relationships, sensory overload, identity, and the stuff nobody explains after diagnosis.
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