Episode 446 of Grief and Happiness is for anyone who's wished a moment of grief or gratitude could last. Author Erica Gerard Di Bona shares how a typewriter and a thousand letters a year have helped her comfort grieving friends and reconnect with a stranger whose life her note changed. Her candid advice on condolences shows why a letter really is better.
In This Episode, You Will Learn:
(00:57) Erica's mission to bring back civility, one letter at a time
(02:36) How grief after losing her husband led Emily to a year of weekly letters
(09:44) Why a letter can reach people carrying hidden grief
(10:49) Erica's advice to stop dancing around the word \"death\"
(18:02) Small ways to stay connected — jokes, clippings, and horoscopes
(21:02) The letter that resurfaced nine months later and changed a stranger's life
(27:23) Erica's \"secret weapon\" for meetings: typed letters as a UC Santa Cruz \"friend raiser\"
(29:23) What to say — and never say — in a condolence letter
(34:14) The century-old letters that revealed hidden family history
(39:46) How one letter can turn someone into a lifelong letter writer
Erica Gerard Di Bona is a lifelong letter writer and author of A Letter Is Better! The Art of Thank You, which makes the case for handwritten notes as tools for connection and healing. A former producer in network news, kids' game shows, and documentaries, she now works as a fundraising consultant for UC Santa Cruz. She types roughly 1,000 letters a year on one of her seven typewriters, connecting her with correspondents like Henry Winkler. Erica lives in Los Angeles with her husband, producer Vin Di Bona, and their daughter.
Erica joins Emily to explore letter writing as an antidote to grief and isolation. She shares how her practice has helped her comfort grieving friends, thank strangers for small kindnesses, and stay close to loved ones far away — including a tattoo artist who called nine months after receiving her note to say it pulled him back from despair. She and Emily also swap stories about century-old letters that revealed hidden family history, showing how a letter can outlast the moment it was written. Erica offers guidance on condolence notes, encouraging people to name death plainly and skip empty platitudes in favor of personal memories — framing letter writing as a small act of kindness that can ease someone's grief.
Connect with Erica Gerard Di Bona:
Book: Erica Gerard Di Bona - A Letter Is Better!: The Art of Thank You
Let's Connect:
The Grief and Happiness Alliance
Book: Emily Thiroux Threatt - Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief
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