Most of us are holding on — in our bodies, our identities, our relationships — without even knowing it. This conversation is about learning to let go.
\"We're really good at holding on — to our material things, our identity, our grudges, our correctness. But letting go, that muscle is a little weak in us.\" — Leslie Howard
Leslie is a yoga teacher, pelvic health specialist, death doula, and author of Pelvic Liberation and the forthcoming Between Breath and Death. In this wide-ranging conversation, she shares how chronic pain led her to specialize in pelvic floor health, why most people (including athletes and yoga practitioners) are too tight — not too loose — and how the same principle of letting go that heals the pelvic floor also applies to identity, suffering, and ultimately, death.
We explore:
• Why 75% of the people Leslie works with have a hypertonic (too tight) pelvic floor — and what causes it
• The connection between trauma, breathing patterns, and chronic pelvic tension
• How savasana can be a portal to genuine non-dual experience
• The relationship between over-identification with the self and suffering
• Gratitude as a daily practice — and why the details matter
• What sitting with dying people has taught Leslie about how to live
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0:00 Introduction
0:08 How Leslie found her way into yoga, pelvic health & death work
4:08 Pelvic floor 101: what's actually going on for most people
5:35 Hypertonic pelvic floor — why tight isn't the same as strong
6:26 Trauma, breathing, and chronic pelvic holding
7:37 Tone vs. tightness: what we actually want from the pelvic floor
8:15 Body awareness, attention & the limits of knowing your own body
10:24 Sexual conditioning, shame & their effect on pelvic health
14:15 Are men's and women's pelvic floor issues that different?
16:46 Savasana as a taught pose — Leslie's approach
19:17 Why stillness has become a radical act
20:48 Practical tools for a guided savasana: mantra, mudra & breath
22:18 The experience of \"no Leslie\" — dissolving identity in savasana
24:43 Over-identification with self as the root of suffering
25:16 What does oneness actually imply? The no-enemy perspective
27:22 Taking action without losing your center
30:04 How to catch yourself and come back to awareness
33:07 What generates our thoughts? The koan approach
34:35 Blame culture and the difficulty of accountability
36:39 What happens in the body when you switch into compassion
38:45 Letting go as a practice — parallels between pelvic work and dying
43:53 What death doula work has done for Leslie personally
45:34 Appreciation for simplicity and the daily three-things practice
49:24 Letters of gratitude — a group practice
53:02 Where to find Leslie and her books
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