What if the anger you feel isn’t really anger at all?
In this episode I sit down with Bryan Blakeny, a therapist and certified Anger Resolution Therapist, to explore why so many men lose it over things that don’t really matter.
We talk about the four hidden fuels behind anger, why feeling powerless so often comes out as rage, how anger gives you a false sense of control when you feel like you have none, and why the standards you keep failing to live up to were often never yours in the first place.
We also explore why looking inward can feel scarier than walking on the moon, why making more money just moves the goalposts, the difference between motivation and a real calling, and how growing up as the son of a premier pushed me into drinking, chasing fame, and believing I’d only be enough if I outdid my dad.
But underneath the conversation about anger, this episode is about something much more personal.Why the things that set you off are rarely the real problem. How the expectations you absorbed as a kid can keep you angry for decades. And what it takes to stop proving yourself and start living by values that are actually your own.
Because anger isn’t the enemy. It’s a signal. And most of us have never learned to read it.
Bryan Blakeny is a licensed clinical social worker and certified Anger Resolution Therapist with more than two decades of experience in counselling and coaching. He runs Blakeny Counseling in Houston, is the author of Top Secret, and his practice has been featured on TLC’s My 600-lb Life.
Timestamps:
(00:00) Introduction: Why Men Get Angry
(01:03) Four Fuels of Anger
(03:43) Standards That Aren’t Yours
(05:22) Disconnected in a Connected World
(08:25) The Fear of Looking Within
(11:06) Stillness and Inner Mining
(15:34) Nick’s Story of Comparison
(17:22) Being vs Doing
(21:10) Staying Grounded in Chaos
(24:57) You Are Not Your Thoughts
(26:35) The Moving Goalpost Trap
(29:45) No Arrival and Daily Practice
(31:45) Depth Over Distraction
(34:02) Mastery Through Contemplation
(35:54) Finding Your True Calling
(38:27) Purpose Versus Motivation
(42:49) Flow State Explained
(47:09) Escaping Victim Mindset
(49:11) Fill Your Capacity
(57:08) Advice To Younger Self
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Website: http://nickbracks.com
Email: contact@nickbracks.com
Connect with Bryan:
Website: bryanblakenytherapy.com
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