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cover art for How to Talk About Sex, Let Go of Shame & Get What You Need | Vanessa Marin

Good Life Project

How to Talk About Sex, Let Go of Shame & Get What You Need | Vanessa Marin

Sex and relationship expert Vanessa Marin discusses the taboo nature of discussing sex and how it can lead to unmet needs and dissatisfaction in relationships. Her new book, Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life, provides practical exercises and dialogue prompts to improve communication around intimacy, breaking down shame and stigma. Through open discussions on touchy subjects and setting rituals for intimacy, Marin believes couples can foster deeper connection, igniting intimacy and enhancing their love lives.


  • Many people struggle to openly discuss sex due to shame and stigma.
  • Open communication about sex and intimacy is important for a healthy relationship.
  • Vanessa recommends five core conversations: acknowledgment, connection, desire, pleasure, and exploration.
  • She provides practical methods to make these conversations easier.
  • Rituals like makeout routines can create intimacy
  • Understanding one's desires, boundaries, and pleasures enables satisfying communication.
  • Giving positive feedback during sex helps partners figure out each other's pleasures.
  • Scheduling sex demonstrates priorities but reframing as "planning" can help.


You can find Vanessa at: Website | Instagram


If you LOVED this episode you’ll also love the conversations we had with Eli Finkel about the self-actualized marriage.


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