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Star Wars Episode VIII Ships

The Last Jedi is in theatres today, and there’s more throbbing, raw sexuality in this cast than in all previous Star Wars movies COMBINED. The Shippers are so turned on by a potential Rey / Kylo Ren ship that we’re going to need to get a cleaning crew in here to hose down the studio. But first, how to deal with a gift-giver who’s only doing performative gift-giving for their own benefit (and, y’know, sorta forcing you to open a dairy farm).